For those concerned for my Soul,

Yes it’s obvious I’m fighting the “establishment” here, but let me clear up this cliché of the emo-kid you might be trying to label me as.

Confession: I’m not “anti”-establishment. Clearly, without some sort organization to more than our social system the anarchy that would ensue would do us in. The human condition could not survive without such. THE PROBLEM is the establishment in which we exist is based on old values and practices that are NO LONGER RELEVENT THEREFORE THE SYSTEM DOESN’T WORK! If you have to ask me to provide you with even one piece of evidence to back up this statement, please stop reading now and go kill yourself.

For some reason I cannot fathom, with the immeasurable capability and power the our minds the social pecking order of our existence still remains to be controlled by our infatuations with money, lust, jealously, materialism, discrimination and the “need” to acquire power. The selfishness of the Human Animal is its greatest weakness.

Unfortunately, and this is where my bitterness and angry come into play; the human condition and instinctual strive for capitalism within everyone is far too great on conflict for us to ever resolve. So, what now? With the realization that “Nothing changes except faces!”, what should I be standing for, where should I start to illustrate the changes that could possible make the “life” I’m living a bit more hospitable? With the mammoth structure that has been built to brainwash and control the question of authority, why should I try to state my opinion at all? For when I do, the vast majority of individuals I’m expressing such to blindly try to persuaded me back into the common census. So, again, Why?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not as negative a person as I may be making myself sound. Most of the time I’m totally fine and content to ostracize myself and to be left alone away from the drove of popular opinion. No skin of my back if I don’t have to play your games. I’m acutely aware of MY human condition and do what I can everyday to make myself okay within myself. I do this of my own accord and also do so without the disfigurement to your stand of such subjects. This is where I love to share the old sentiment “live and let live.” At the point I realize my view on the matter is not something you are going to accept I will leave you alone with it. Being standoffish with the masses is a step in my process I accepting-ly undertake. Don’t take my bitterness as pure hatred, for I do, very much so, enjoy this experience of life and the bountiful sensations and especially the socialization that come along with it, just don’t undermine it because, as you see, I won’t hold back.

So now you must be dizzy with the thoughts of; “Where did this kid’s diatribe just come from?” It’s as simple as I’m just tired. Tired of struggling to get by and exist comfortably, let alone lavishly, (so much for the American dream) tired of not being able to stand on my own and to make ends meet. Take note that none of this blame can be transferred to anybody buy myself. I take full responsibility for my own actions and power. (ie, if I smoked less I could afford better food, but you know, I like smoking so why should I have to settle for less?) and all of this comes full circle when, in my struggling I make a comment or post something here on the interweb and its met with the previously mentioned response of, “Well, why don’t you…” and I’m tired (there’s that word again) of it and its frustrating.

I don’t usually make such long and evolved editorials to express my opinions. I usually just keep my mouth shut and keep moving as I brush your dust off my shoulder but today I’m just particularly aggravated with these states of affairs. Hopefully this has shed some softer light on my image. Hopefully and couple of you will find some truth in proclaimed statement of; “I’m no jaded, I’m just realistic!”

As it is, now that I’m done ranting, I think I’ll take a walk, it’s sunny, warm and I’ll relish it.

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